Every question deserves a few more mental watts.
This piece has been around for quite awhile in slightly different versions. I think it is used by Covey. But, a friend just picked a very good time to send it to me again and I take the time to pass it on to you.
And, PS, I know those are gumballs, but it was the closest public domain image I could find. 
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers. A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes….’
The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed…
‘Now,’ said the professor as the laughter subsided, ‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things—your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions—and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car…
The sand is everything else—the small stuff.
‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued, ‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness:
- Spend time with your children.
- Spend time with your parents.
- Visit with grandparents.
- Take your spouse out to dinner.
- Play another 18.
There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first—the things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand.
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented.
The professor smiled and said, ‘I’m glad you asked.’
The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.
Mayo? Beers? Maynard, it’s a sign! Let’s go get a couple of beers. Want to meet in Iowa?
Posted 5 months, 3 weeks ago at 10:06 pm. 9 comments
Yesterday, a high school boy tried to pull off a Columbine massacre at a Bay Area High School and we are talking about serious intent. He had 15 or so pipe bombs, two of which he managed to set off – no one injured, thank God – and had various weapons including a chain saw and a sword with him. Those people he didn’t get with the bombs, he intended to get with the saw or the sword!
Now, this might have ended very badly – except that at great personal risk, a teacher tackled him at total personal risk. Some people are like that. Presented with life-threatening risk, they perform, often without thinking about it twice. These are special people.
My Uncle Rudolf, shown in the above picture in 1937 feeding a wild bear in the woods at Yosemite Park, was one of these special people. But, he was different than some people who can face danger or aggression with equanimity. He wasn’t one of the aggressive people to be around, he was more a magic man who seemed totally unafraid of anything. In New York, they were building a skyscraper and everything was taken down from the construction one day except some essential tools. Well, they couldn’t rig all the safety stuff to go back up there, they needed someone to go out onto naked girders 50 stories above the ground to retrieve them. Uncle Rudolf said sure, he would do it and waltzed right out and got them and brought them down. He probably would have done it without pay, but the money was nice.
Visiting a huge dam, he got up on the railing and the edge and walked out, right on the edge of a gazillion foot drop. Now, I’ve had some adventures in my life, but you’d have to tie me up with a rope and haul me out to get me to do some of the things he did!
And, as a kid, I can remember what a delight it was to have Uncle Rudolf around. He would play the neatest games with you.
All of these characteristics, coupled with a pretty good head on his shoulders, made him a pretty astute business person and he ended up going to California and becoming a successful almond rancher. He had a great life right up until in his late 80’s he died on the French Riviera!
Have you had anyone special like that in your life?
Advisory: don’t feed wild bears in Yosemite!
Posted 6 months, 2 weeks ago at 2:35 am. 10 comments
My sister sent this to me and it is just too good to not share:
Wouldn’t it be good if we all felt like this DAD???
When I was a little boy, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. On that evening so long ago, my mom walked into the dining room and placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned toast in front of my dad.
I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his toast, smile at my mom, and ask me how my day was at school.
I don’t remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite! When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast. And I’ll never forget what he said. ‘Baby, I love burned toast.’
Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night, and I asked him if he really liked his toast burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, ‘Little Buddy, your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she’s real tired. And besides-a little burnt toast never hurt anyone! You know, life is full of imperfect things…and imperfect people. I personally am not the best at some things either.’
What I’ve learned over the years is that learning to accept each other’s faults – and choosing to celebrate each other’s differences – is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship. We could extend this to any relationship in fact – as understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife or parent-child or friendship!!"
Don’t put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket – but into your own. No one else can MAKE you happy, your happiness is a choice you make.
Now, I didn’t share that because I am even remotely like that dad. In fact, the picture above is an actual picture of me from when my toast was burned! However, I’ve known some people like that … and I’ll share one with you tomorrow morning. He was one of my great uncles – and great in more ways than one!
Posted 6 months, 2 weeks ago at 2:00 am. 18 comments
"After 40 every man gets the face he deserves"
— Abraham Lincoln
Uncle Frank earned that face. Some of it was formed by nature. Some of it was formed in a brawl or two. Most of it was formed by character.
He was one of those rare thoughtful few who knew that only a few men looked at life by what was right and never paid much attention to the cost. If you are lucky, you’ve known a person like this in your life. If you were luckier, you were related to him.
When he was a boy, he and my Mom’s Dad, brothers, had to take the girls to school across pastures in the snow. They didn’t have a real sled, it was kind of a platform that didn’t actually have runners. Aunt Esther, Aunt Mary – and one other I think that I can’t think of – rode on the platform and it was a lot of work for the boys. So, one day they got the bright idea that they could hook it to the cow and let the cow pull it. Unfortunately, the “sled” got hung up in something and it literally pulled the cow’s tail off! True story! And they got in a lot of trouble.
Later, Uncle Frank could trade anything and always came out well in the deal. He went out with the goat during the depression, traded the goat for something, traded that for something else … and on and on … only to come back and trade something for the original goat! Came home with the goat and other stuff.
Later, he and his wife went out with a wagon and had a bunch of blueing on it for people to use with their laundries. By the time he got done selling it, he had made enough profit to buy a lot at the edge of town. He dug a hole in the lot, put a roof over it, and moved the family in! My grandpa did the same thing next door and Mom grew up in that dugout. I’ll let her tell you more tales of life in it.
Uncle Frank liked to go out and drink with the boys. He was a happy drunk! Some drunks weren’t happy drunks. Now, Uncle Frank wasn’t very big. The biggest thing he had going for him was his heart. But, what the bigger, unhappier drunks didn’t know was that even though Uncle Frank never started fights, he finished them! Dad says he hit like a mule!
Uncle Frank never got rich. Unless you count life experience, that is! In that case, he was Rockefeller.
And, yes, Grannymar, his ancestry was Irish!
Posted 6 months, 3 weeks ago at 3:52 am. 6 comments
Part of the continuing Blogger’s Consortium series with simultaneous posts on the topic being done by Ashok, Grannymar and Ramana – in alphabetical order.
I don’t know about you – although from reactions of readers, this is something I think we share – but I always look forward to their Friday entries on our common topic. Fine writers, thinkers and FRIENDS all!
Also note that as you read this today, I am sitting at my parent’s house in Kansas! My responses my be slower than usual rather than merely their usual slow wit.
With the death of Walter Cronkite, I noticed many people waxing not merely nostalgic about “Uncle Walter”, but mourning the passing of fine journalism itself. The nightly news on CBS by Cronkite was trusted by America; we were getting the unvarnished truth, we felt, the real story. Today? Well, let’s be generous and say that we have our doubts.
So, what has happened to us over these past few decades? Are we really going to Hell in the convenient hand basket that seems custom made? I think we are dealing with a large confluence of forces:
Walter is gone!
Don’t look to the past. Ed Murrow is gone. Walter is gone. Winston Churchill and FDR are gone. They were legends in their time, but we always live in our own present – and we often look wistfully backwards with longing. Let’s look for what we’ve got. And let’s see what we can develop. There is room for a new set of legends if that is what we find we want or need.
News is business!
It always has been. Don’t be confused about this. If news doesn’t sell, it really doesn’t matter how insightful it is. Murrow dealt with it in his time. He wanted to do items that scared the crap out of the CBS brass. Some things threaten the bottom line!
Unfortunately, what sells is often more entertainment than news. If it is sensational, does that make it more newsworthy than something that is insightful? When the Loma Prieta earthquake struck the San Francisco Bay Area in 1989, news crews set up night after night at the most obvious scenes of destruction they could find. If your only source was the national news at that time, you would think the entire area was rubble. But, the truth was that you had to really go out of your way to see anything with visible damage. It wasn’t that the earthquake did not have severe consequences – but they certainly took advantage of any drama where they could find it.
Information is everywhere!
It used to be radio news, the evening TV news and the morning paper. Now, TV news is 24-hour. The Internet is an endless immediate source. As I write this, ABC has just informed me via my phone that Bill Clinton has just spoken with the journalists captured in North Korea (I am writing this portion on Tuesday morning, by the way). I can get news anywhere, any time almost literally.
That means that a lot of it isn’t vetted. I really do believe that Cronkite and Murrow took very seriously their vows to do accurate reporting of events and everything was as thoroughly checked for accuracy as possible. Working with Angie Massie, the executive producer of Rick Sanchez’s show on CNN, I have watched how she sometimes has to take the time to check out information even though many of us have told her that something has happened, such as the death of Michael Jackson. It does not make it to the show until well after it has hit various sources in many cases. So, she is doing a balancing act and the value of the news is directly dependent upon viewers deciding which is more important to them – accuracy or speed of information. You vote with your remote! And … I haven’t even mentioned meaning, yet. Misinformation, intentional and unintentional has created a cottage industry for Snopes to deal with.
News is no longer cornered by local journalism.
Al Jazeera and many other sources are coming into their own as more reliable, honest brokers as we move forward. There are times when they tell the truth that American interests would rather not!
Since becoming close to Ramana Rajgopaul, news of the Indian region has taken on new meaning to me and I watch carefully the developments in Pakistan. He often sends me information from news sources I might not have noticed and it often expands my awareness enormously.
Likewise, friends online via Twitter and Skype Chat are showing me sources that they find from their personal perspectives. It is good to spread your wings!
Some news organizations are more politics than news and have a strong base they appeal to.
Fox News is the most blatant of the modern news / political organizations. Every organization has biases. Every organization packages the “truth” for reasons given above. By definition, virtually everything packaged into a news piece must summarize and leave many things out. But, I have sat, for as long as I could take it, and watched Glenn Beck straight out lie to the viewers. On global warming, it was chilly that day in New York and he used that cold snap as proof that global warming wasn’t happening. If you are educated, you know that a heat wave or a cold snap in isolation neither proves nor disproves anything about climate. And, that pissed me off.
So, who are the new legends?
The consumers of the news can be the legends of our times. We can drive the search for meaning and accuracy in ways never before possible. In the past, feedback was too slow and on too small of a scale. The only real information flow was from our sources to our viewers. Nielsen ratings were about the most immediate response known by major organizations. Not anymore. Feedback to them is as immediate in many cases as their information flow to us. The conversation is still in its infancy. But, more than ever before, we are the determinants of just how good or how bad modern journalism is. If we want to believe that Elvis is alive and living with space aliens – and who doesn’t believe that! – then, that is what we will find filling our networks. If we are a celebrity driven culture in general, that is what the news will be disproportionately about … in case you hadn’t noticed. And, if we decide to dig in our heels and say, “Hey, what is really going on in Iran?” or “Who was behind that decision?” we will be rewarded. It is totally up to us and the sky is the limit.
Or, rather, our common understanding of what we want and expect for ourselves, our world and our children is the limit …
Cronkite picture created by NASA and is public domain.
Posted 7 months ago at 10:00 am. 15 comments
I was just reading a posting the other day on a person at Stanford, Lera Boroditsky, who studies how language shapes our thoughts! About the only acquaintance with the idea I had seen before that was the old one of the Eskimos having about 27 words (or something like that) for snow. And bloggers have 300 words to describe blogging? uh…maybe the trend isn’t universal.
In any case, with the Eskimos, we are assuming that it just gives them more nuance and detail about snow than those of us (other than GL in Minnesota) need. However, Ms. Boroditsky takes it to a very new level. Different cultures with different language right beside one another describing something with, one would assume, equal significance to each, view things very differently based upon the way it is described by their languages.
The first example she gives is how Germans and French reports on a bridge described it very differently, the Germans seeing the beauty and the French seeing the power, the massive presence … wait, are we talking about the Germans and French in reverse here? French seeing power where Germans see beauty??? Well, cultural traits aside, it turns out that in German, bridge is Brücke, which is feminine, while in French it is pont which is masculine. It seems, as she goes on to point out with other examples, that the gender of a noun in many languages determines the way we perceive the object it refers to. Masculine tends to point to rugged, powerful, muscular, massive. Feminine tends toward light, delicate, beautiful.
Remember our piece on stereotypes? Well, it seems that we actually stereotype objects by assigning gender at the same time that we reinforce the stereotypes of gender itself in the reference. Interesting.
English does not assign genders to nouns. Does that mean we see things as asexual eunuchs? I need some readers who speak other languages to give me a little perspective here. Help me Rhonda, what are the implications for cognition?
And … what do you think they call the world’s biggest functional spur, found at the Abilene, KS rodeo grounds?
Posted 7 months, 2 weeks ago at 6:46 am. 26 comments
bikehikebabe wondered about the “luv” in CommentLuv that you see at the bottom of comments. Well, the luv stands for love and that is what anyone in the trenches really feels for others in the trenches.
Let me explain. Bloggers, just like anyone else undertaking an expressive, fairly public endeavor find that it would be very lonely and unsatisfying without readers. But, it would also be unsatisfying without fellow bloggers – and that is what CommentLuv was invented to reward. Many of my readers are fellow bloggers and they understand what it is like trying to express fresh ideas on a regular basis. Smart ideas are even worse! When Rhonda or Ramana or Gail or Deb or bhb or Jean or Corky or Viki or Ashok or GL or Marianna or Grannymar… or Curly, Larry or Moe swoop in with a creative comment, the blogger says a combination of two words, YEAH! and WHEW. It is like the Hebrew name for God and is spelled YWHEW! and is unpronounceable except when under duress.
Well, bhb, CommentLuv points with luv to the most recent post by that blogger. It is paying homage to the effort. Giving a roadmap to one another’s sites. It is a way of saying thanks for showing up and making a comment.
We all rely on one another to scratch where we can’t reach ourselves. Like they say, a dinosaur’s or a blogger’s reach must exceed his grasp, else what is a little luv for?
Posted 7 months, 3 weeks ago at 3:20 pm. 28 comments
Quite lovely, I must say!
And, now, Gail, conscience obviously bothering her, has sent us what she says is the real Gail. This may not be the last of the series, so I will date this:
July 21, 2009
What nice lipstick! And such a shapely gorillish figure. You need to get out of the sun more, though. You are developing a squint!
Posted 7 months, 3 weeks ago at 2:06 pm. 9 comments
I don’t know whether it is today or a week from today, but bikehikebabe, treasured member of our family, is getting a new hip! That’s big stuff for someone as active as our intrepid adventurer.
So, why don’t all of you other family members leave her some encouraging messages as she heals and heads to new adventures.
Here’s to good healing, bhb!!!
Posted 8 months, 2 weeks ago at 2:34 pm. 29 comments
So, citizens of America and of the World, you may have noticed that California is in fiscal and social crisis. In fact, today is just another budget deadline unmet. Put America on steroids and give it breast augmentation, boil it in the legendary melting pot, then pour it into one bordered area called a state and Voila! – California.
This is the view expressed by the San Francisco Bay Guardian on the left. Which is appropriate, because we are so often referred to as the Left Coast, due to the whole center of the nation thinking we are this left-wing stronghold.
But, look at that map more closely. We are actually “America’s America” as Bill Clinton referred to us. You can’t refer to the land that produced Ronald Reagan and Richard Nixon, among others, as being just “Left.”
Now, I’m by no means a California expert, but let me describe these different regions so you will have some idea why the legislature is so bad. And, boy are they bad, but I’ll get to that in just a bit. Also recognize the broad brush these regions are painted with. For example, you would find fry-your-butt Redding – where the summers get to 6 million degrees – in Greenland. You see what I mean, but in my descriptions, I will follow the fantasy that these are actually totally homogeneous regions, because that really does help describe the governing problem.
Greenland: This is the area where the giant redwoods live. Stunning countryside. A world of its own that you have to experience to know what it is like. Kind of like the Grand Canyon in that sense. Sorry, but a movie or a picture can’t do it justice. And, oh the sweet air and the serenity…and you better take care of ancient forest groves – unless you work at a lumber mill and are unemployed. Or, unless you are a spotted owl.
Sierrastan: Kind of akin to Greenland. GOOD mountains! Lake Tahoe, mountain cabins, Yosemite Valley, ski resorts. And mountain people with their own hard edged views of the universe and their own priorities! Environment first. And, we are armed if you want to trash it any!
Coastland: Santa Cruz, Monterey, Big Sur, San Luis Obispo, Santa Barbara. The ocean is everything! Don’t mess with the Coast! Environment is big there. Whales are big there. Surfing is big there.
Notaxistan: This is the conservative Central Valley. This is the heartland transplanted. Really. This is Kansas. Don’t tax ‘em. And don’t bring any of your fancy liberal ideas out here, either. Oh, yeah, and send us all the water you can!!
Palm Sprawl: Palm Springs, Death Valley, Mojave Desert. This is where the people of Hell go when they need a little more warmth. I have seen days when the low in Truckee (which is in Sierrastan) is over 100 degrees cooler than the high in Death Valley. In the same day! I’m not sure where they stand on stuff. But, wherever it is, it’s HOT!
North Mexico: San Diego area. There is a whole lot of Mexican immigration happening here. And, some of it is legal. It is one of the few places where the highways have signs warning you to watch out for families running across the highway! Really! But, go there and you have to fall in love with it. And, the Mexican influences really are a net positive. Have you noticed any Hispanic influence on the names you see here? It’s almost like we took it from them! They are a rapidly growing political force. Some want it back!
Disney: I suppose you could name it that, but I have a friend on the CNN Chat site that knows it more truly for what it is, “Behind the Orange Curtain!” Orange County is THE bastion of conservative political clout. That’s where the Reagans and Nixons sprout from. It is also a huge source of American image making, for better or worse. Hollywood, Disney and a whole lot of industry. World is writ BIG there. It’s the LA area, after all. Need I say more? Poverty mixed with BIG BUCKS!
Pinkostan: Last but hardly least, this is where I live! San Francisco, the Bay, myths abounding across the nation that EVERYONE is gay. The home of Nancy Pelosi. Also the home of some of the finest halls of higher learning that you can find anywhere, Berkeley and Stanford. I will go out on a limb and say it is slightly liberal. Well, a lot. But, nowhere near like the myth. It is kind of like you transplanted a European city and called it San Francisco and that has become the entire myth. But, don’t forget, we also have Silicon Valley, the Napa Valley and we are the original home of Wells Fargo, Bank of America, Visa, Google, Apple and the first radio broadcasting and the invention of television and on and on. Charlie Chaplin even started here. So, don’t give me your simplified stereotypes!
So, those are the parts of a state that tipped over would reach 1/3 of the way across the North American Continent. One in ten Americans live here. I think Hollywood developed here because we have every possible look and terrain you could ever want for filming. It is the eighth largest economy in the entire world (used to be sixth, but, you know) and when it gets its act back together, LOOK OUT!
So why can’t it get its act together? Well, it’s like the story of the blind men and the elephant. The first blind man grabs the trunk and says it is very much like a snake. The second grabs a leg and says it is very much like a tree. The third, the tail and says it is very like a rope. You get the idea. Each has a different idea of what is good for this creature.
In the same manner, each area of California has its own idea of what is good for the state. Unfortunately, pushed and elected by their parochial constituents, most legislators are blind and have a different idea of what is good for the elephant. No one sees the elephant as a whole creature and so no one can ride and guide it. The Governator would love to, but we have gone for glitz rather than experience. He’s a smart enough guy, really, but being an actor may not be as helpful in learning about governing as…well…as governing is! To put frosting on the cake, it takes a 2/3 majority to pass the budget, so a minority view can hold the body as a whole hostage.
Somebody will come along that can ride this thing and can herd all the blind cats in the legislature. And, when they do, oh baby what a ride!!!
What do I think? I think we should quit electing actors and Lilly-livered varmints. I’m sure somebody will turn that into a proposition for us to vote on, too!
Posted 8 months, 3 weeks ago at 8:12 pm. 23 comments
